What Womanhood Means to Me
by Mary Fahey
I first learned about
women from watching my mother and her three sisters. Even though they each had
a husband and family, they made it a point to get together every Tuesday for
lunch and a game of cards. They talked and laughed and gossiped as women of
their age did. Occasionally a couple of them had a disagreement but they never
stayed angry with each other and all got resolved before the afternoon ended.
My sister Dorothy and I continued the closeness we observed in the older women
of our family. Along with my cousin June, we often went out to lunch or to a
show and always had a great time, laughing and talking. Dorothy and I had
occasional tiffs but like our predecessors, we loved each other too much to
stay angry.
I attended an all girls’
school for twelve years and forged tight friendships with some of the other
girls in my class. We are still in touch and remain friendly to this day. My
friend Catherine and I have maintained our friendship since the age of six.
As a nurse I worked in a predominately female profession.
Because of the early
exposure to female friendship, I feel very at ease and trusting of other women.
My current circle of friends remains important to me. We meet on a regular
basis and share our triumphs and disappointments. We know that we will
celebrate each others’ accomplishments and care for each other in times of
stress.
I’ve heard that some females
mistrust each other. I never experienced this. So I believe that a woman possesses
the qualities of friendship, trust, support and nurture.
As I grew to adulthood,
I experienced some bias against the female species as a whole and some
discrimination personally. So my idea of a woman became one of subjugation. I
never accepted this image and fought it whenever it crossed my path but not
always successfully. Most women of my era used feminine wiles to get their own
way and I must admit it worked on some men but I thought it demeaning to both
men and women. It made men seem like dupes that a woman could so easily
manipulate them.
My mother always told
me that I could do anything I put my mind to and I still believe that. So to
round out the qualities of a woman I add intelligence, independence and steadfastness.
