When
you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don’t blame the lettuce. You
look into the reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more
water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce.
Yet
if we have problems with our friends or our family, we blame the other person.
But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like lettuce.
Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason
and arguments. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just
understanding.
If
you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the
situation will change.
----Thích Nhất Hạnh
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